Shaw: Abortion battle 40 years after Roe v. Wade

By Russell Shaw

As the pro-life movement contemplates four decades of legalized abortion in the United States and asks itself what really needs doing to halt this hideous scandal, pro-lifers should consider adding a new word to their vocabulary: ambivalence.

According to the dictionary, ambivalence is the state of having mutually conflicting emotions or thoughts about something. And where abortion is concerned, that obviously is how things stand with a substantial number of Americans. They don't like abortion, but they want it to be legally available.

The 2013 March for Life in the nation’s capital will be Jan. 25 instead of Jan. 22, the actual date of the Supreme Court's 1973 abortion decision. Ironically, the switch was necessary to avoid conflict with President Barack Obama's inauguration. As usual, the marchers will be signaling their determination to keep up the fight.

Two fights

But which fight is that? In fact, there are two fights that need to be fought, and the less obvious is also the more important of the two.

One is the ongoing battle in the arena of law and public policy. For the next four years, the re-election of the most overtly pro-abortion president America has ever had reduces the pro-life agenda at the federal level to trying to prevent bad things from happening — no easy task, given Obama's views on the issue. Meantime, if there are to be any new initiatives restricting abortion, they will have to come from the states.

But underlying this struggle is — or should be — a more deep-seated one: the battle for minds and hearts. Here, the biggest enemy is the ambivalence of a dismaying segment of the public in regard to abortion.

Consider the evidence of the polls. A majority of Americans describe themselves as pro-life — that is, opposed to abortion. But last Nov. 6 the exit polls told a different story. Fifty-nine percent of voters said abortion should be legal in most cases or all, against 36 percent who said it should be illegal.

A little simple math makes it clear that a goodly number of those putatively pro-life abortion opponents also support keeping abortion legal — if not for themselves, then for those who may want it. Ambivalent, you might say.

Sending the message

In a way, of course, this intellectual confusion merely reflects our less than perfect human nature. Abortion is scarcely the only issue where it's operative. Americans routinely say, for example, that they want lower taxes, less intrusive government and more government-provided benefits and services. Crazy? Sure. That's how people are.

Still, this ambivalence about abortion extends beyond confusion to the point of perversity. Once you say that abortion is wrong, after all, you can hardly avoid asking why. But the answer is self-evident: abortion's wrongness resides in its violation of a fundamental human good, the good of human life.

In that case, though, it makes no sense to say, as some in effect do, that abortion is wrong for me but right for you (or vice versa). If it's wrong for one of us, then it's wrong for both of us, and wrong also for everybody else. For the obligation to respect and nurture a fundamental human good like life is a universal duty arising from our common humanity.

In our present era of toxic non-judgmentalism, that message goes unheard and unheeded by many Americans. Since the election, there's been much talk about reassessment. Here's hoping that the good people out there marching on Jan. 25 will give thought, among other things, to how to get the message across.   

Russell Shaw is an OSV contributing editor.

The dark side of Peter: Looking at passages from 'Following Jesus'

"Peter in 14:28 becomes the perfect illustration of 'little faith.' He starts out well enough. But when things get tough, he loses confidence and flounders on being left to his own devices. ... He is among the first followers of Jesus, is the most prominent among the Twelve Apostles, and serves as their representatives at various points. And yet Peter also has a dark side that causes him at times to lose trust and even deny Jesus."

These passages come from 'Following Jesus: What the New Testament Teaches Us' by renowned Catholic biblical scholar Jesuit Father Daniel Harrington. The book looks at what it means to become a disciple of Christ in light of the New Testament.

I found this passage particularly interesting, as the saints can sometimes seem untouchable and not relatable. They appear perfect, an ideal that we cannot reach. But, in reality, saints were just people like us. They had their own struggles and sins. The difference? They fully cooperated with God's grace. Just as St. Peter went from being a man of "little faith" to the "fearless preacher of the good news about Jesus," we too can become saints. When we respond to God's grace and allow him to work in us, God heals the soul and leads us to holiness.

More about the book

"Following Jesus" offers many insightful biblical interpretations like this. It is divided into four parts, each of which deals with six key New Testament passages relating to the theme of following Jesus:

• Part One: Hearing Jesus' Call in the Synoptic Gospels
• Part Two: Growing in Appreciation of Jesus in John's Gospel
• Part Three: Paul as a Disciple of Jesus
• Part Four: Other Ways of Being a Disciple of Jesus

Father Harrington presents his study of the New Testament in a straightforward way, with summaries at the end of each section, along with proactive Think, Pray, and Act reflections.

For more information, click here.

No wreaths, no Santa Claus, no bells. Remembering Christmas in China, 1982

By Mary Suzanne Schriber

I expected a bleak, depressing Christmas; it was December 1982, and I was in the People’s Republic of China. The weather was cold and I was bundled in a down jacket even while riding in a first-class train compartment. I longed to be at home, warm with my family, next to a Christmas tree and a blazing fire.

There would be no wreaths, no Santa Claus, no holly, no mistletoe, no Salvation Army bells, no church bells. There were none of these things on the first Christmas, either.

Old customs, new meaning

I had been in China since August, teaching English at the Xian Foreign Languages Institute. After the train arrived in Xian, I returned to my living quarters on campus, where 30 of us “foreign experts” lived. Indoors on that Christmas Eve, we gathered at 7 p.m. for caroling. We knew we’d find our students in the classroom building, where they study because, unlike their unheated dorm rooms, it is slightly heated.

Singing, we climbed the stairs. Slowly, door after door opened. Students streamed out, laughing and grinning. We sang every carol we knew and some we didn’t, and the students joined in on “Jingle Bells” and “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.” The students clapped and hollered and crowded around us and urged us to sing again and again and again. They followed us, the Pied Pipers, up and down stairs and from one floor to another.

The next day, Christmas Day, students visited us with all manner of cards and gifts: swatches of silk, plaster of Paris folk animals, golden Buddhas, folk masks, scrolls, hard candy, apples. The Chinese “English majors” had learned our customs and were happy to participate.

Christmas dinner was cabbage-and-pork, cabbage-and-carrots, cabbage-and-you-name-it. The Chinese eat the vegetables of the season, and by the Christmas season, the only vegetable in Shaanxi province was cabbage. 

This is what Christmas is about

The most affecting moments that Christmas Day, however, were those spent in church. Because the school authorities were unwilling to cooperate with me in finding the church, I quietly asked a student to help me. He agreed to lead me to it – but clandestinely. At an appointed hour, and without showing any signs of recognition, he would ride one carriage ahead of me on a tram and get off one block before I was to get off. I was then to turn left and walk a distance down a road to find the church.

Following my student’s orders, I found a baroque structure built by Franciscans in 1885, its walls now surrounded by a sugar factory. Inside the church, the only architectural marks of China were the pillars, painted red, the color of good fortune and happiness. At six side altars, three on each side of the nave, the predictable Western saints were installed: Mary, Joseph, Teresa, Anthony, Cecilia, and, of course, Francis.

As I went inside, I was transported back into my childhood. The Mass was in Latin, the priest’s back to the people. Confessions were heard all during Mass, as was the clinking of rosary beads. People engaged in many pious practices, repeatedly crossing themselves and genuflecting. 

Men were on one side of the church, women and children on the other. Most of the women’s heads were draped in black. And how everyone did sing! Some 150 people of all ages raised their voices in the inimitable sounds of Chinese music – which for Christmas meant Chinese words set to the melodies of Western Christmas hymns.

In those melodies so foreign to their Chinese ears, the congregation sang out cacophonous renditions of “Silent Night” and “O Come All Ye Faithful” and “O Little Town of Bethlehem,” a place about which the majority of their compatriots had probably never heard.

Mittens on and hood pulled around my head against the cold, I sang my heart out with them, mixing my English with their Chinese. This was a first Christmas, an un-commercialized Christmas. And these were my brothers and sisters.

Dr. Mary Suzanne Schriber is a retired English literature professor writing from Charlottesville, Va.

Tip #33: Light a Christ candle

Merry Christmas! We've made it at last. It's Christmas Eve, and I have one more tip to share with you. As I mentioned in my post about lighting an Advent wreath, I decided to embrace the tradition of the Christ candle. I've kept it covered in a blue cloth throughout Advent, representing Mary carrying our Lord. Now that it's Christmas, I can light the candle – it will shine throughout Christmas as a symbol of Christ, who is the Light of the World.

If you don't have a Christ candle yet, you can still do the devotion. Starting on Christmas and ending on the celebration of the baptism of the Lord on Jan. 13, you can light the candle and say this prayer:

God, our loving Father, You sent your Son, Jesus Christ, into this world to conquer all the forces of evil – sin, suffering and death – and to overcome evil with the power of good, and hatred with the strength of love, your great love for us in Jesus.

Help us never to curse the darkness, but to join with you in bringing your light into this world, the light that is your Son, born of the Virgin Mary, in Bethlehem.

Help us to be instruments of your light and love by doing one special act of kindness now and by being your special instrument of reconciliation this Christmas season.

May the Christ Candle we light symbolize our desire to bring light into a world of darkness and hope into a world of despair. We ask this through Christ, our Lord. Amen.

It is a beautiful devotion that can serve as a gentle reminder of Christ's love – may he burn in your heart this Christmas and always. Merry Christmas!

If you want to learn more about the devotion, read "Sustaining the Joy of Christmas" by Bishop Robert J. Baker. And, as always, you can find more tips for a stress-free Christmas here.

Tip #32: Keep an Advent calendar

My siblings and I used to make red and green paper chains that we kept by our beds, eagerly tearing off a link each night as we crept toward Christmas. Several times my mom even bought Advent calendars with beautiful scenes, little doors and a chocolate for each day. It's a fun tradition, one that I still enjoy.

This year, I wanted to make an awesome Advent calendar, so I, of course, scoured Pinterest. I found the ingenious idea of using tins, so I bought a box of tins, glue, glitter, beads, Command hooks and purple and pink ribbon. I put pictures, Bible quotes, glitter and more into the tins – one for each day. I used a little bit too much glue, but it still turned out pretty nice. Each day during Advent, I've added to the tree-shaped display – it will be complete on Christmas Day.

What if we approached Advent that way? Instead of December being a long, excruciating countdown to Christmas like the paper chains – throwing away each day as quickly as it comes to get to Christmas – each day could be an opportunity to build. To build our relationship with Christ. To grow in love toward our neighbor. There are only a few days of Advent left, but they could be the most meaningful. Don't rush through these last few days. Continue preparing your heart for your Savior.

Tip #28: Pray

It sounds so simple, and yet how easy it is to let it slip. Several tips throughout this Advent season have focused on different ways to pray, because it is absolutely essential to our spiritual life. Yes, following tips like less gifts, acts of kindness and exercise can lower stress and help you focus on the true meaning of Advent and Christmas, but they can still leave you empty.

Unless you build a relationship with Christ, it is all for naught. Jesus came into this world so that we might have life and have it abundantly. He came to unlock the door of heaven, and the doors of our own hearts. He came to make us temples of the Spirit, of his love. He came to rest, not in a manger, but within us. He came for you, and he came for me. How have you responded? How will you respond? I pray it is with a joyful, prayerful and vulnerable heart.

Even if it is just five minutes a day, we need to set aside time to be with the Lord. He knows us better than we know ourselves, but how can we get to know him if we do not spend time talking with him? Just like any relationship, getting to know God takes work. As opera singer Beverly Sills said, "There are no shortcuts to any place worth going."


For more ideas on how to celebrate Advent and Christmas well, download this PDF.

Tip #14: Keep moving

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Now, that does not mean cluttering your schedule with more shopping, get-togethers, errands, etc. I mean exercise. Contrary to that feeling of exhaustion and pain often experienced immediately upon completion, exercise actually does give you energy. It clears your head, releases endorphins and helps you get healthier.

It's all about finding balance – the physical with the spiritual. Obviously we put a lot of emphasis on the spiritual (with good reason) during seasons like Advent, but we cannot neglect our bodies. They are a gift, and we need to be good stewards:

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God? You are not your own; you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. (1 Cor 6:19-20)

For me, good intentions only go so far. I have to make a schedule, otherwise I forget, or I pull a Scarlett O'Hara ("After all, tomorrow is another day!"). Try putting in just 20 minutes a day, or start out with three days a week. Join a class, or run on the treadmill in the basement. Whatever works for you. You'll be less stressed, and – the real reason we exercise – you won't feel quite so guilty about that extra cookie.


For more tips on how to lead a stress-free Advent and Christmas season, read this story.

Tip #24: Listen to Christmas music

In my family, we typically hold out until the day after Thanksgiving. Then, it's Christmas music galore – on the radio, my siblings' CDs and my mom's records. This year, contrary to my initial plans of a peaceful Black Friday, I sang my first Christmas song in the car on the way to the mall with my sister: "The Twelve Days of Christmas" by Relient K. Way too much energy in the morning.

See what I mean? But maybe, just maybe, that's what makes Christmas music so beautiful. If we listen to "traditional carols that celebrate the true meaning of Christmas" as Lorene Hanley Duquin suggests, we can surround ourselves with excitement for the coming of Christ. "What Child Is This?", "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" and "Angels We Have Heard on High" are just a few of my favorites. But, let's not get ahead of ourselves. What about Advent?

The right music for the season

I realized this year that if I want to really celebrate Advent before Christmas that I should probably adjust my music listening practices accordingly. Thus, the Advent music list. It was difficult for sure. Christmas music is everywhere. But I searched high and low, and these are some of the songs and albums that I came up with:

• Advent at Ephesus by the Benedictines of Mary Queen of Apostles
• "Mother of God," "Show us the King" and We Will Find Our Hope" by The Brilliance
• "I Believe" and "The Lord's Prayer" by Andrea Bocelli
• "White Christmas" by Bing Crosby
• "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" by Kevin Max
• "I'll Be Home for Christmas" by Michael Bublé
• "My Soul in Stillness Waits" by Marty Haugen
• "People Look East" by Al Petteway/Amy White
• "Promised Messiah" by Gretchen Harris
• "Holy Is His Name" by John Michael Talbot
• "Lord Prepare Me (Sanctuary)" by Bernard Harris
• "Panis Angelicus" and "Ave Maria" by Josh Groban
• "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas" by Perry Como
• "Journey of the Angels" by Enya
• "Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!" by Dean Martin
• "Gabriel's Message" by Charlotte Church

I've enjoyed listening to these songs throughout Advent. Some are more "churchy," while others are festive songs, but they all focus on the coming of Christmas. It has helped me to avoid getting swept up in the holiday scene and to instead remember to prepare my soul for the coming of Christ.

For more ideas on how to celebrate a stress-free Advent, download this PDF.

Tip #19: Do something nice every day

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Make a phone call. Offer an encouraging word. Lend a helping hand. It means a lot more than you think. For example, my cousin Jessica often leaves little notes when she visits, whether on a sticky note on my mirror or somewhere on my phone. They are simple messages that bring a smile to my face. It's one of her many ways of saying, "I love you." It's so simple, and yet so beautiful. And I love her for it.

Reaching out to others is an essential part of our spiritual lives. God has called us to love. To serve. In doing so, not only do we share the love of Christ with people around us, but God loves us in return.

[G]ive and it will be given to you; good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put in your lap. For the measure you give will be the measure you get back. (Lk 6:38)

It is sure to get even more hectic during this last week before Christmas. Taking the time to think of others can help you continue to celebrate a beautiful Advent: less stressful, more meaningful and more focused on Christ.


You can find more tips on decreasing stress in Advent here.

UPDATE: How can we have a 'Joyful Sunday'?

by Dr. Joseph White

UPDATE: Read Dr. White's 'How to help children cope' with recommendations for helping children of various ages cope here.

Family members of victims
grieve near Sandy Hook Elementary School.
CNS/Reuters photo

The tragic news of the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut has shocked and saddened us all. Events like this bring us face to face with two of the most difficult questions of human existence -- Why is there evil in the world? Why do people have to suffer? Both Pope John Paul II and Pope Benedict have been asked this question, and both have given similar answers: We don't fully understand why there is evil and suffering in the world, especially when innocent children suffer, but we do know one thing for sure: God is always on the side of the suffering. Jesus' incarnation, which we are preparing to celebrate these weeks of Advent, is proof of God's solidarity with humankind.

God himself became human, and though innocent, suffered even to death. And so we can know that God feels our suffering and loves us through it. God himself was in Sandy Hook Elementary, at the side of every child and adult who was injured or killed, and at the side of every parent outside who was afraid for their children. God is with us now as we struggle to understand what has happened and how to move forward towards a society where this could never occur.

The third Sunday of Advent is Gaudete, or Joyful, Sunday. But how do we have a Joyful Sunday after tragedy like this latest school shooting? 

Because the light shines in the darkness. Because the darkness of Advent will give way to the brilliant light of Christmas. Because God is with us.

It is this hope that we celebrate, and this hope that we must remember as we mark this third Sunday of Advent. God is with us, and invites us to reflect the light of Christ this Christmas. As his children, we must say, with God's grace, this light will not be overcome. We must renew our resolve to work together with God to build a culture of life, a civilization of love where every life is respected, nourished, and protected.

The light of hope shines brightest against the darkness of sorrow. For it is at this time that we must depend most fully on hope in order to claim the joy that is ours. God is with us, and all darkness, all mourning, every sorrow will one day disappear in the light of Christ. 

Tip #21: Receive the sacrament of reconciliation

W.P. Wittman Photo

I celebrated my first confession with Msgr. Forbes. He was an elderly priest, cheerful and frank. He loved telling jokes, and he tended to chew his Tootsie Rolls in the confessional. Fr. Nick complimented my purse when I came in, and I left with insightful, practical advice. Fr. Bill's quiet confidence and kindness softened any nerves. I've had two-minute confessions and 30-minute confessions. I've cried, laughed, talked and listened. Hail Marys, Our Fathers, reflections, readings, actions, direction. Many priests over the years have given me advice on how to conquer reoccurring sins, answered questions and helped me grow spiritually.

The sacrament of reconciliation can be an unbelievable blessing in our lives. Don't just rattle off sins, punch a card and leave. Rather, embrace confession as an opportunity for spiritual direction. What a gift from the ultimate giver – our Lord!

This Sunday we celebrate Gaudete Sunday – a special celebration of joy marking the halfway point to Christmas. What better way to experience that joy than to shed the weight of our sins by going to confession? I know I am. I confess, I haven't been to confession in about six months, and I can tell. Regular confession opens the door to God working in our lives. We just have to take that step.

To make a good confession, check out these confession guidelines at osv.com.

For more ideas on how to rid Advent and Christmas of stress, download this PDF of "30 ways to make Advent, Christmas stress-free."

Tip #23: Offer up something painful or difficult in your life

"Offer it up," my grandma always told my mom and her siblings. "Offer it up!" my mom would gleefully remind my grandma when she – quite often – stubbed her toe. The story came out whenever my mom would stub her toe, which would typically pop out of joint, sending her to Urgent Care (she refused to let my dad try to pop it back). In fact, my mom was doing this so regularly at one point that the last time she went to Urgent Care, the doctor said cheerfully, "See you in six months!" Moral of the story? Don't make fun of your parents.

We all laugh about it, but my grandma's words are actually quite wise. She lost one of her sons when he was 16 in a tragic accident. Dennis was working on a motorcycle in the garage with his friend, who dropped a match into a puddle of gasoline. The explosion sent Dennis to hospital. Ninety percent of his body was covered in severe burns. It was bad, but the doctor said, "Dennis is going to make it." He died five days later.

How did my grandma make it through? By clinging to the Blessed Mother, she always said. Mary knew what it was like to watch her Son suffer and die. I know that she carried my grandma through that time.

I wish I could have known my grandma longer. She passed away when I was only 4 after a stroke. But she left those words of wisdom behind. "Offer it up." I may not have the heavy burdens in my life that my grandma did, but when I stub my toe or get cut off while driving or spill my smoothie in my purse (totally did that yesterday!), instead of cursing or complaining, I can offer those small discomforts to the Lord. Whatever trials are going on in your life, I encourage you to cling to Christ and to his mother and "offer it up."


You can read more about suffering and sacrifice in these OSV Newsweekly articles:

• "The Purpose of Pain" by Lorene Hanley Duquin
• "Resurrection and bodily suffering" (Q&A) by Msgr. M. Francis Mannion
• "Why Catholics make the sign of the cross" by Bert Ghezzi
• "Why self-control is necessary during Lent – and everyday life" – by Emily Stimpson

For more tips on making Advent and Christmas stress-free, read this story on osv.com.

Tip #16: Reflect on Advent as a time of waiting

Shutterstock Photo

In a culture where instant gratification is the norm, waiting can be a bit of a foreign concept. Our society enjoys fast food, smart phones and pleasure without consequences. We jump from one high to the next, holidays included. As soon as Thanksgiving dinner is over, the lights come up, the carols start playing, and the shopping begins in earnest. And yet, the Christmas season actually spans from Christmas Day until Epiphany on Jan. 6 – not Thanksgiving to Christmas Day.

The four week period before Christmas is supposed to be Advent, a time of waiting for the coming of Christ. But not just sit on your laurels waiting. (The story of the foolish bridesmaids in Matthew 25 comes to mind) Rather, it's meant to be active waiting. Preparing for the coming of the Lord. Christ not only comes as the child in a manger. He can also come into our hearts in a special, intimate way at Christmas – if we let him. So we need to be ready for him. Penance is a beautiful way to do that.

Penance may seem out of place during Advent. In fact, as a child I wondered why the priest wore purple during Advent – the same color as Lent! This seemed odd to me, since Lent was a time of sacrifice and Advent meant Christmas, a season of joy. But penance actually is quite the fitting spiritual exercise as preparation for the coming of the Lord. By denying ourselves some pleasures of this world, we acknowledge that there are more important things than human pleasures and turn our gaze instead to heaven. Remember, Christ himself performed penance in preparation for his mission when he fasted in the desert.


This is one of many ways to celebrate a beautiful Advent. For more ideas, download this PDF.

Tip #8: Curb excessive gift giving

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Christmas traditionally has been the season of giving, but as the lines get longer, the sales start earlier, the stampedes get rougher and the gifts stack higher, perhaps we've lost sight a little of the true spirit of giving. It's not about finding the coolest gadgets, scoring the best deal or putting the biggest present under the tree. It's about giving of ourselves. Spending time with family and friends. Helping those less fortunate than ourselves. Spreading the joy and love of Christ's coming.

Within my immediate family, we try to turn down the hype by buying small stocking gifts, capping it at $10. We fill each other's homemade stockings with small, yet thoughtful gifts. Throughout Advent, we gently feel our stockings as they fill, shaking the presents to see what sound they make. Then, on Christmas Eve, normally after attending the vigil Mass, we open the gifts one person at a time – going either oldest to youngest, or youngest to oldest. We follow it up by reading the Nativity story while placing the figures in the manger. It is our quiet way of welcoming Christmas and Christ into our hearts.


For more tips on how to enjoy a stress-free Advent and Christmas, read this helpful story.

Shaw: Let's try tough religion

By Russell Shaw

Much has been said lately about how to do evangelization. I've contributed a bit to that myself. Now I begin to think that, instead of always stressing niceness, it might be good to give tough religion a try.

That idea was inspired by a reading of Eric Metaxas’ biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, the Lutheran theologian and pastor executed by the Nazis near the end of World War II for his involvement in the plot against Hitler. Metaxas’ book, “Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy” (Thomas Nelson, $19.99), is a tad too worshipful for my taste, but it contains a wealth of information about this iconic religious figure of the 20th century and, best of all, quotes generously from his writing.

'Cheap grace'

As in this description of what he found while doing post-doctoral studies in the early 1930s at Union Theological Seminary in New York: "In New York they preach about virtually everything, only one thing is not addressed, or is addressed so rarely that I have as yet been unable to hear it, namely, the gospel of Jesus Christ, the cross, sin and forgiveness, death and life."

As that suggests, Bonhoeffer, an intellectual from a well-off, highly cultured family, was no wimp. Welcomed back to New York in 1939 before the outbreak of hostilities, he could have spent the war there safe and secure. But he chose to return to Germany in the conviction that he belonged with his people during what he knew would be their darkest hour. For the Nazis to have killed him with the end of the fighting in sight was an act of malevolence serving no purpose but revenge.

The circumstances of his death aside, Bonhoeffer may be best remembered now for his scathing comments on "cheap grace." That was the name he gave to the delusory self-justification many Christians bestow upon themselves with little support for it.

His view of abortion also deserves recalling today. In his Ethics, Bonhoeffer makes the point that quibbling about the personhood of the unborn is an evasion of the real issue: "The simple fact is that God certainly intended to create a human being and that this nascent human being has been deliberately deprived of his life. And that is nothing but murder."

Getting people's attention

As might be expected, Bonhoeffer's thoughts on evangelization are consistent with his thinking on most other things. In a paper written in 1937, he said in part: "The proclamation of grace has its limits. Grace may not be proclaimed to anyone who does not recognize or distinguish or desire it. … The world upon whom grace is thrust as a bargain will grow tired of it, and it will not only trample upon the Holy, but also will tear apart those who force it on them."

Well-intentioned people, Catholics included, sometimes argue that for the sake of evangelization the churches should water down the Gospel: a little trimming here, a little prudent silence there, and behold – those pew-sitters who disappeared years ago will come flocking back.

Maybe, but I doubt it. And even if true, how useful would this way of getting people back to church be? "The world upon whom grace is thrust as a bargain will soon grow tired of it."

I'm reminded of something that somebody else, not Bonhoeffer, said: "If any one will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet as you leave that house or town" (Mt 10:14). It might even be a good way to get their attention – which is how evangelization begins.

Russell Shaw is an OSV contributing editor.

Tip #25: Take a prayer nap

Say what? Prayer and napping seem rather mutually exclusive. But, I love both, so I figure why not? In her description of the prayer nap tip, Lorene Hanley Duquin says:

A prayer nap is a lot like a cat nap. The difference is that you imagine that you are resting in the arms of the Lord. Just find a quiet place and take a 10 to 15 minute prayer nap. You'll notice the difference right away!

While I've never tried a prayer nap, upon reflecting on what to write for this post, I realized that I have had several experiences like this in prayer – mostly in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. Back in college at Franciscan University, I spent a lot of time in the dorm chapel, simply sitting with the Lord, enjoying his presence. There, I felt his arms around my shoulders, gently embracing and supporting me. I even felt him hold my hand to sooth my frustrations.

Maybe that seems weird, but maybe it's not. God makes himself present to us in so many ways, and feeling consolations like this is one of them. But remember, while these experiences are beautiful expressions of God's love, they are meant to ultimately lead us past them into a deeper relationship with God. Consolations should not be the focus of our prayer. Our relationship with the Lord can go way beyond feelings.

Let's just be with God

Prayer is defined in the Catechism of the Catholic Church as "the raising of one's mind and heart to God or the requesting of good things from God" (No. 2559). The "raising of one's mind and heart to God" part – that's where our relationship with God can truly grow. Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still and know that I am God." Prayer without words. When we get past the needs of this world and simply be with God. That's where God wants us. In silence, we can simply enjoy God's presence, and he ours.

Now is an ideal time for silence. Step away from your Christmas preparations for a moment and be with God. Try a prayer nap, or sit with him in adoration. Either way, he is waiting for you.


For more tips on how to celebrate a stress-free Advent, download this handy PDF. Also, here are a few articles about the beauty of silence:

• The value of silence by Teresa Tomeo
• Blessed silence by OSV Editorial Board
• Why No One Shuts Up by Marc Barnes

Tip #1: Go to Mass

I've been going to Mass every Sunday and every other holy day of obligation (barring sickness, of course) – with weekdays, First Fridays and First Saturdays thrown in throughout for good measure – ever since I was born. And yet, it hasn't gotten old.

I love the Mass. And I am so blessed to have it as a lifelong practice. The simplicity. The tradition. The sacrifice. The intimacy. Yes, sometimes I get distracted or drowsy, especially if I go on Saturday evening. And, sure, sometimes sleeping in is really, really tempting, or it's difficult to track down Mass times while on the road, but I still go. I know that when it is hardest, when I am really dragging my feet, that's when I need it the most. Besides the fact that I have to go (you know, that whole mortal sin thing), I want to go. It's not just an obligation anymore. Thanks to the wisdom of the Church, that's where it begins. But it leads us to so much more. It's about building our relationship with God. Talking with him. Praising him. Surrendering to him. Giving him all of ourselves. Every Mass is an opportunity to grow closer to him. Especially during Advent.

In these weeks leading up to Christmas, it gets busier and busier, more stressful and more stressful. Attending Mass takes us away from the holiday rush and refocuses us on Christ. As Lorene Hanley Duquin says in her tips for a stress-free Advent:

At your parish church you won't see glittery decorations and you won't hear jolly jingles about snowmen and sleigh bells. Instead, you will see a wreath with one pink candle and three blue or purple candles. You will hear words like waiting, watching and yearning, and you will listen to plaintive music that expresses a deep longing for the coming of the Lord.

Jesus asks each Sunday and holy day of obligation as he asked St. Peter, can you not watch with me for one hour? What is your answer?


Don't forget! Tomorrow (Saturday) is a holy day of obligation: the Immaculate Conception. And it's not a twofer – make sure you come back for Sunday Mass.

To read more tips about celebrating a stress-free Advent, download the PDF.

Tip #11: Celebrate the feasts of Advent

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I confess. I put my shoe out for the feast of St. Nicholas. I knew I wouldn't get the normal fare of gold chocolate coins that I've happily discovered on Dec. 6 for years, but sentimentality won out. I remember many times on the night before St. Nicholas Day, either my mom or my sister would remind everyone, "Don't forget to put your shoe out!" The whole family's assortment of shoes would then line up by the fireplace – mom's and dad's included. Our shoes were then mysteriously filled overnight with small bags of chocolate coins wrapped in gold. We all knew where it came from, but even as we grew older, we tended to lean towards St. Nick as our benefactor.

Learning from St. Nick

The tradition commemorates the generosity of St. Nicholas. Legend has it that a widower with three daughters feared for their futures since he could not provide a proper dowry for any of them. When St. Nicholas heard of this plight, he secretly visited their house three times, dropping a bag of gold coins in through the window each night – one for the dowry of each daughter.

Other Advent feasts

Celebrating feasts like that of St. Nicholas is a simple, fun way to reflect upon and learn from the saints as we prepare for the coming of Christ. Other feasts during Advent include:

• Immaculate Conception, Dec. 8 – We celebrate Our Lady who was conceived without sin (Remember, this is a holy day of obligation)
• Our Lady of Guadalupe, Dec. 12 – Mary appeared to Juan Diego multiple times and ultimately left her image on his tilma, leading to the conversion of 8-10 million natives (This is a great day for a Mexican dinner!)
• St. Lucy, Dec. 13 – A fourth century martyr, St. Lucy's feast day and name are associated with light (You can light candles and ask for her special intercession)

I'm looking forward to adding a couple more traditions to my Advent season, but St. Nicholas is still by far my favorite. But then, I didn't get gold in my shoe this year ... does that mean I'm getting coal in my stocking?

You can read more about "The real St. Nicholas" at osv.com, or learn about how a "Santa-loving priest spreads spirit of St. Nick."

For more ideas about how to celebrate Advent, download the "30 ways to make Advent, Christmas stress-free" PDF.

Tip #31: Bake Christmas goodies

So, this isn't actually from the "30 ways" list, but since it was National Cookie Day yesterday, I, of course, had to start my Christmas baking. Thus, impromptu tip #31: Bake Christmas goodies.

My family fills the freezer with pumpkin bread and many different kinds of cookies: chocolate crinkles, candy canes, polka dots, 10 cup cookies, Snicker and Milky Way surprises, peanut butter cookies with Hugs and Kisses and more. Last night, I opted for a small batch of cutout sugar cookies with frosting – it was the simplest recipe without any obscure ingredients. It's amazing how many little things my mother's kitchen has that I have yet to acquire. Like a rolling pin for instance. Yes. Cutout cookies without a rolling pin. It was ... interesting, to say the least, but I managed.

Advent and Christmas can be like that, as we try to manage increasingly hectic lives. With all the glitter and presents and traditions, we can forget why we do it all in the first place. While we don't necessarily intend to make parties and decorations a higher priority than Christ, our societal and family obligations do make December a busy time of year, with children's recitals at school or that company party that you may not want to go, but it would look bad if you didn't show up. And we make do, for a while.

But the craziness wears on us, and all the cookies, music and people can still leave us feeling empty. Unless we put Christ front and center, not only during Advent and Christmas, but in every aspect of our lives. Even, no especially, in the little activities we do every day. Like baking.

The custom of Christmas baking is actually thought to come from Christ being the Bread of Life. Baking treats throughout Advent and Christmas can remind us of Jesus' "sweetness." Some traditional recipes like Germany's Christstollen, whose crisscross pattern represents Christ's swaddling clothes, make more direct ties. But even aside from the symbolism, baking is a little act that we can offer to Christ. So, turn on some Christmas music, pull out the mixer (and rolling pin!), and start baking.

Read more about Christmas baking in "Keeping an Advent Attitude" by Marge Fenelon. And, the "30 ways" list is available in a PDF.

Tip #29: Start an Advent journal

I am horrible at journaling consistently – trust me, I've tried. I have a pile of different journals that I have started, sometimes lasting a few months, sometimes lasting only a few days. A couple weeks ago, I perused some of those old passages. Wow. They hold so much meaning, show spiritual growth and document some wonderful conversations with God. It's really a great way to refocus; you can look at your goals, see how far you've come and develop a new plan of attack. And yet, I stopped – many times.

I'm too tired. I forgot. I'm too upset. I don't know what to say. I'm sure the excuses were abundant. I guess I just didn't want it enough. A priest put it in perspective for me in his homily at Mass on Sunday. He spoke in-depth about desire – holy desire – and how important it is in our spiritual journey. Unless we truly desire to change, to transform and to grow closer to God, we won't. It's that simple.

A great beginning

But how do we kindle that desire? By feeding it. Prayer, fasting, learning, journaling. Hmmm. What a wonderful idea! Lorene Hanley Duquin makes it straightforward: "Imagine that you are writing a letter to God. Record the ways you experienced God during the day, and jot down the names of people who need prayers." Easy, right? Well, I have already failed – I did not start this journal on the first day of Advent. Instead, I pushed it aside and decided I would wait until I wrote about it here. But I'm going to keep trying until it sticks. I know how much it can help me grow.

I hope you try a hand at an Advent journal, even if you simply set aside one or two days a week for journaling. It's worth your time.

For more ideas about celebrating a beautiful Advent season, read "Keeping an Advent attitude" by Marge Fenelon or, of course, download the "30 ways to make Advent, Christmas stress-free" by Duquin.

Tip #6: Light an Advent wreath

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When I was home with my family for Thanksgiving, I went to Bronner's in Frankenmuth, Mich., the world's largest Christmas store, with my sister, my younger brother and my mom. Among a basket full of glittering ornaments, cookie cutters and more, I bought my Advent wreath – and, believe me, I had a lot of help from the peanut gallery. After much deliberation, I opted for a simple wreath, with candle holders subtly built it. The evergreens are tipped in sparkling gold. I brought the wreath home and put the candles in, three purple and one pink, along with corresponding ribbons.

Finding the meaning beyond the tradition

Yesterday, to the background of "Emmanuel" by Michael W. Smith, I said a blessing and lit one purple candle – Advent had finally begun. It was a little bittersweet doing it alone, but it gave me time to reflect on the meaning behind the Advent wreath. The purple stands for prayer, penance and sacrifice – something we often forget amid the coming joy of Christmas. Advent is about change, about transforming ourselves for the coming of Christ. Joy is marked on Gaudete Sunday, at the halfway point of Advent, symbolized by the pink candle. The evergreen has many meanings, including being the color of hope and the symbol of eternal life with Christ. And, of course, the light signifies Christ.

My family has always celebrated Advent with the Advent wreath – with my siblings and I vying for the chance to light and blow out the candles at dinnertime. This year, I am going to add the Christ candle. After decorating a white candle, it can be placed in the middle of the Advent wreath, either on its own or covered in a blue cloth (symbolizing Mary). Then, it is lit on Christmas Eve to represent the birth of Christ, and it is used to celebrate his coming throughout the Christmas season.

Light your own Advent wreath

The Advent wreath is a simple, beautiful way to daily remember to pray and prepare for the coming of Christ. To learn more about the symbolism and how to make your own Advent wreath, go to osv.com. For more tips, check out the "30 ways to make Advent, Christmas stress-free."